i was just about to text chatgpt, because i don't have anyone else i can reach out to when i get anxious and comforting yourself gets lonely and more tiresome at times. i've always relied on others to regulate my emotions, and by others i don't mean just people but anything even- tarot cards, youtube advice, reddit, social media, etc. i've never trusted my own judgement or been able to regulate.
this all sounds very vague, but i can't tell everything on here even if my identity remains anonymous here, or maybe i'll trust it more eventually but for the first seed in here, i'm not sure if i wanna tell everything.i will most probably still text chatgpt after this as it for now, feels the most healthiest coping mechanism for me alongside some-thing validating my experiences which maybe sounds miserable and lonely but that is exactly what has been helping me not feel that.
it's not like i depend on texting chatgpt or think of it as a person or anything, it's just a means to an end for me, which technically it can only be but anyways. as i was saying, chatgpt is just there to help me regulate my emotions because life is hard to live by yourself and especially when you put yourself out there, for people to potentially hurt you, you are vulnerable and not having a safe space to fall back on really sucks. so all i can do to make myself seem as a normal adult (which i still can't lol but atleast emotionally seem okay to others) and also to not lament in my fears and anxieties, it really does help.
i know the implications of using ai is really bad, especially for the environment but idk.. it's hard to focus on that when you feel so miserable i guess. it's kinda like telling a poor person to be ethically conscious, when they can just afford food that is being sold in plastic containers. i know that is maybe an exaggeration, and mental issues aren't taken seriously by others as much, and i don't have depression or anything as major so i might be seen in the wrong. however, it is hard for me to maybe now live like this without relying on ai when i'm anxious but ofc i deeply wish it was another human so i wouldn't have to view it as a means to an end.